To Overcome Speaking Fear, Throw Away Your Mask

Let’s face it—for audiences, the message and the messenger are usually the same thing. You are the message your audience receives as much as anything you say. So you’d better be aware of the impression you’re broadcasting!

First, understand that you're a natural performer. As sociologist Erving Goffman reminded us in his 1972 book, The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life, each of us plays many roles in our daily lives.

We shape ourselves, that is, to meet the needs of the audience we’re with at the moment. The “you” shopping in the supermarket, for instance, is a different person from the “you” on a first date, or the one explaining to your boss the reasons you deserve a raise.

This knowledge, that we play different roles even in a typical day, should be a liberating thought. By acknowledging that a speech situation is simply one of the many “performances” we give every day of our lives, we can embrace each such opportunity instead of fearing it.

In other words: there really is nothing unusual or momentous about speaking in public. We’re always giving some kind of performance or other in our lives. Public speaking just gives us the opportunity to do it all with a bit more pizzazz!

Reveal Your True Self

One of the fascinating things about speaking in public is that it reveals so much about who we are as human beings. Even as a former actor, I would have to work ferociously hard to hide my true nature when I talk to people about something that really matters to me.

And if I did, all of my focus and concentration would be directed inward instead of where it needs to be: on keeping my audience actively engaged with my critical message.

The problem with being this comfortable with self-exposure occurs when we perceive a speaking situation as something “different” and intimidating. That’s when we become nervous and afraid; and in response, we slip on our presentation masks or don our invisible protective armor.

In other words—we temporarily become someone we really aren’t. And audiences sense it immediately.

We need to throw away the mask, to let our true self come through for our sake and our listeners’. We need, in other words, to remain vulnerable.

You may think that’s too hard a task to accomplish in front of other professionals and perhaps complete strangers. But the opposite is true. Being honest with an audience makes everything easier on both sides.

Hiding from who you really are is much harder work for you and your listeners.